How to Ignite Intimacy in Marriage

THE PASSAGE  

Song of Songs 4:1–5:1, NIV 

IT ALL STARTS WITH A SPARK  

How to Ignite Intimacy in the Marriage 

S: Share   

P: Prioritize  

A: Appearance   

R: Respect  

K: Kindness   

TALK IT OVER 

Note to Leaders: 

• Encourage group members to actively participate by volunteering to read and discuss the biblical references, fostering a deeper understanding of how God's Word applies to their marriage and relationships. 

• Share with the group: Please consider how you can support our new Thursday night service, aimed at reaching those who cannot attend on weekends. Pastor Ryan invites our Sunday families with many weekend commitments and those who enjoy sports and the outdoors to join him on Thursdays. Let's work together to reach more people for Christ in the North Valley! 

Questions for Discussion:  

Icebreaker: What's one small thing that always brings a spark of joy to your day? 

1. In your own words, explain why shared communication is important in any relationship, especially marriage. Can someone find and read Proverbs 15:1, and discuss how it relates to open communication in your relationships, married or single? 

2. How can couples effectively express their thoughts, feelings, needs, and desires to one another without fear of judgment or misunderstanding? Look up James 1:19-20 and discuss its guidance for healthy communication in marriage or dating relationships.

3. Discuss the idea of prioritizing your spouse's interests above your own. How can you actively demonstrate this in your marriage? Read Philippians 2:3-4 together and share practical ways to implement it. For singles, discuss the idea of prioritizing your friend's interests above your own. 

4. How can you plan and prioritize quality time together, considering the busy schedules and responsibilities that often come with married life? Search for Ecclesiastes 3:1 and discuss its relevance to managing time as a couple. 

5. Share a personal example of how physical appearance and attraction played a role in your dating or married relationships. How do you maintain the attraction you have for each other?  

6. How does respect contribute to trust and vulnerability in any relationship? Share ways you show respect to your spouse or significant other. What are some little or big things you can do? 

7. Discuss some practical acts of kindness that you can incorporate into your relationship to strengthen your emotional bond and ignite intimacy. Consider reading Ephesians 4:32 and brainstorming acts of kindness you can practice.

8. Share a specific example of a kind word or action you received from a significant other or your spouse that made you feel loved and appreciated. Reflect on Galatians 5:22-23 and its mention of kindness as a fruit of the Spirit. 

9. In what ways can couples nurture intimacy through their words, thoughts, actions, tones, and acts of service toward each other? Read Colossians 3:12-14 together and discuss how these qualities contribute to marital intimacy. 

PRAYER: Wrap up in prayer, allowing members to share their prayer requests. Encourage ongoing prayer for each other throughout the week to nurture a sense of unity and care within the group.